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Thursday, July 28, 2016

50 Questions To Free Your Mind

(For the 101 things Challenge.)

1.How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

Probably around Eighty. Most of my interests and personality are that of a much older woman, and I've been told I possess wisdom far beyond my years.

2.Which is worse, failing or never trying?

Never trying. When you don't try something, you will always regret that. And regretting something you now can never do is much worse than regretting something that's done and in the past.

3.If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don’t like and like so many things we don’t do?

We do so many things we don't like, because society pushes it upon us. We are considered "weird" if we don't. And we like so many things we don't do, often because we have never actually tried them. There is a preconceived "I like this" when we don't really know if we do or do not.

4.When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?

There really is no way to tell, but I hope not. I suppose to some extent I will have.

5.What is the one thing you’d most like to change about the world?

People often speak, but rarely do they listen. It's hard to intelligently discuss issues with people, because they are too full of their own opinions to listen to anything you have to say, and your reasoning behind it. Sometimes I am guilty of this as well, but I try my hardest not to be.

6.If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?

A museum curator, or a worship leader, or a Japanese teacher, or anything where I get to share my passions with people, help people cultivate their own passions, or lead others to knowing God.

7.Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?

I'm settling right now I suppose. All of my goals are things that I'll be doing after college, so right now I'm setting the stage for doing what I believe in.

8.If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?

I would be skipping college, and finding another way to pursue my plans.

9.To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?

Very little. And I think that anyone who thinks they actually have any control on where their life is heading are living in a fantasy world. But, what you do have control of are your actions, and how you perceive what is thrown at you in life.

10.Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?

Doing the right thing.

11.You’re having lunch with three people you respect and admire. They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend. The criticism is distasteful and unjustified. What do you do?

I would probably first try to steer them away from the conversation first, and tell them not to gossip. If they continued, I'd tell them I was friends with the person, and ask them to stop. And if that didn't work, then I'd find some new friends.

12.If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be?

Be confident in yourself. The world will try to tell you all the things that are wrong with you, and try to mold you into something that is pleasing to them, but that's not who God made you to be. You are you for a reason. Embrace that, and love yourself.

13.Would you break the law to save a loved one?

This is entirely dependent on what kind of law. Like, if the loved one did something stupid, and is now in trouble with the law, no way. They need to face the consequences. But if the law is something small, like say trespassing or something, I would probably consider it.

14.Have you ever seen insanity where you later saw creativity?

When I was younger I thought that all kinds of depressing things were strange. Now I find them strangely beautiful and inspiring for the most part.

15.What’s something you know you do differently than most people?

I think differently than other people. I always look at things logically and weigh the options, but I also rely on faith. It's kind of a 50-50, whereas most people I know rely on one or the other, and usually can't even comprehend what it means to think from the other side.

16. How come the things that make you happy don’t make everyone happy?

Because we are all unique and distinct people who don't have to think the same. (That sounds kind of condescending or something, but it's the truth ^^;)

17.What one thing have you not done that you really want to do? What’s holding you back?

I want to go to Japan. Finances and circumstances are holding me back, but I'm trying to push through them.

18.Are you holding onto something you need to let go of?

Embarrassment, and shame. I'm not sure how to let them go.

19.If you had to move to a state or country besides the one you currently live in, where would you move and why?

For a state, I'd probably move to Tennessee. It's so beautiful there, and the people seemed very friendly. For a country, I'd move to Japan. I've loved Japan since I was very young. Their food, culture, people, all of it is just so wonderful. Granted, they're not perfect, but in this crazy world, I feel like Japan would be a pretty peaceful and great place to live.

20.Do you push the elevator button more than once? Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster?

I have never pushed the button more than once. I didn't even know people did that. Why would you?

21.Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton?

Joyful simpleton. I'm a worried genius half of the time, but when I am joyful I am so much happier. I'd take joy over knowledge any day.

22.Why are you, you?

Because that's how God made me to be. I feel like if you're not a Christian this would lead to a weird headspace where you question all of life and the universe and all that stuff. But for me, it's really a simple question.

23.Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend?

Most of the time, yes. Which can be a bit frustrating when that type of friendship isn't returned.

24.Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you?

Losing touch. You can always find ways to keep contact when someone moves away, but it's often impossible to repair a friendship that's dissolved.

25.What are you most grateful for?

Being born into a loving family. I feel like because my family was so stable, that's why I myself have been very stable. I'm very grateful for that.

26.Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones?

I would rather lose all of my old memories. I've had a pretty good past, but I think that there are some memories I'd rather forget, and I feel like the people around me are good enough to help catch me up on who I was and would help me move on to making better memories than I had before.

27.Is is possible to know the truth without challenging it first?

I think that it is, but I think that true blind faith is a lot harder to come by. For most people, me included, questioning things is a natural part of life. And I don't think there is anything wrong with that. Christians freak out when people talk about questioning their faith, but all the times I've questioned my faith have led me closer to God, and helped me realize that God really is truth. I think it's good to challenge and question everything you believe in, because then when you come to your final conclusion you will hopefully have strong reasons and facts to back it up, which can help you stay strong when other people begin to question you on why you believe what you believe.

28.Has your greatest fear ever come true?

No. And I hope that it never does...

29.Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset? Does it really matter now?

I've never really been that upset in my life, so no. 

30.What is your happiest childhood memory? What makes it so special?

I think my happiest childhood memory is playing with my parents when I was 6 or so. I'm not quite sure why that memory is so special, we were just playing with my toys like usual, but I remember it fondly.

31.At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?

Probably church camp 2015. I really had a chance to connect to God, and to pursue my passions. It was a great week, and I'm really grateful for being able to be a part of it.

32.If not now, then when?

No idea really. I'm still trying to figure that one out...

33.If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?

Nothing I suppose. But that doesn't stop me from fretting over the outcome anyways.

34.Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?

Sometimes I feel that way when I'm with my best friends. We can just sit and silence, and it still feels like we're hanging out.

35.Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?

Because we live in a fallen world with people who are broken. And those broken people can make good decisions, or bad decisions. And many of them happen to be a part of religion. But really, there are many people not in religions who are the same.

36.Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?

I think with some things it's very clear, because God wrote it down in the bible for us. But for a lot of things, I think God leaves it up to us. I do think that he'll let us know if something is good or evil if we ask, but I also think that sometimes he let's us figure it out for ourselves, so that we can see how great our faith really is.

37.If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?

I'm not sure yet, as I'm still in university, but hopefully the job I have will be something I enjoy, so that I will want to come back each day not for the money, but for myself.

38.Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?

Less work. Too much work, even if I like it, sends my anxiety through the roof. Mainly because I'm a perfectionist, and I feel like I have to give everything 100%. 

39.Do you feel like you’ve lived this day a hundred times before?

No. Even when my days are average and nothing exciting happens, I still feel like each day is different from the last. I've never felt like any day was a repeat of another.

40.When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly believed in?

I feel like I do that everyday. I have no idea what I really and truly want to do with my life, other than that I want to go to Japan. So I take every day as it comes, and I try my best to make my way in the world.

41.If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?

My grandparents, my two best friends, and my pastors. I'd also probably go out and witness on the streets, and try to serve everyone I can.

42.Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous?

No. Being famous is a hassle in my opinion. Someone is always judging and watching everything you do when you're famous, you can't go out on your own, and you can't live a normal life. And being extremely attractive would bring catcalling, and people hitting on me, which as an asexual, sounds like a nightmare. So no. I'll keep my 10 years, and live a happy long life as an average human being.

43.What is the difference between being alive and truly living?

I feel like this is a cliche answer, but basically being alive is just going through the day to day movements, and truly living is doing what you really want to do and what makes you happy.

44.When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?

I'm really not sure. I'm still trying to figure that out. But I feel like if it isn't going to cause you or others harm of any kind, and if you've really thought about it, most of the time you should go ahead and do it.

45.If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?

Oh dear, don't ask me this one. I'm gonna go all teacher on you.... Basically, we are taught that failure means the end. That if you fail, then you're not good at something, and you move on to something else. And even if people tell you later in life that you learn from failures, that original idea is ingrained in your head. Instead, you should look at failure as a spring board. Think of it as the first trial in an experiment.

46.What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

I wouldn't sugar coat my words, or worry about offending anyone. I'd go everywhere in full on mori girl coordinates; the mall, church, hiking, everywhere. I'd share what I was feeling all the time, instead of catering to others.

47.When was the last time you noticed the sound of your own breathing?

I usually notice at least once a month. Is that weird? It usually is fueled by existential crises where I suddenly realize how weird it is to be alive...

48.What do you love? Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?

I don't know really. I love my family and friends, and I tell them so and show it by doing things for them and with them. I love Jesus, but I feel like I don't show this enough. I love lots of other little things, but I keep those to myself unless asked usually.

49.In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday? What about the day before that? Or the day before that?

Probably not. I only remember the feelings of things I did. Kind of like each season of my life had a feeling. But I hardly remember the mundane.

50.Decisions are being made right now. The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?

A little of both. I think it's just because of the stage of life I'm in. An adult, but not yet on my own.

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